Sorry You Died, Son
Yes, I’m laughing at you.
“Mom! Guess how long I lasted in this game.”
“Well, you’ve been in your room for hours, so I’m going to guess…hours.”
“A minute 38.”
“What have you been doing in there for so long?”
“Playing random games. This one is new. It’s called My Summer Car. When the game starts, you’re in a cabin. I decided to get really drunk.”
“You’re not old enough.”
“Mom.”
“Okay, fine. Thanks for getting obnoxiously drunk in a game and not in real life. I’m so proud.”
“So I got really drunk and on the side of the screen my bladder meter showed full.”
“What kind of game IS this?!”
“So I decided to empty my bladder, peed on the tv, electrocuted myself, and died.”
“Oh my goodness.”
“I didn’t think I could die while I was still in the cabin. I thought I would at least get out the door.”
“You do understand how dumb this game sounds, right?”
“Yep. I’m gonna go try again.”
“We need to go back to when you were only allowed to play educational games.”
